Someone sent in an application for a gun permit that included a $5 check and the following information:

Last Name: Ludwig
First Name: Bubba
Date of Birth: 2006
Sex: Male Race: White
Height: 2 ft 3 in Weight: 20 lbsHave you ever been convicted of a felony? No
In the past 5 years, have you been a patient in any medical facility or part of any medical facility used primarily for the care or treatment of persons for mental illness? No
Are you addicted to narcotics? No
Are you mentally retarded? No
Are you an alien who is unlawfully present in the United States? No

Signature: [a scribble]

There’s one important question they didn’t ask: Are you an infant?

If they had, the Illinois State Police would have learned that they were about to issue a Firearm Owner’s Identification Card to a 10-month-old baby named Howard David Ludwig. His father, also named Howard, filed the form after someone bought the baby a 12-gauge shotgun.

“As a FOID cardholder, baby Bubba can own a firearm and ammunition in Illinois. He can also legally transport an unloaded weapon — though he can’t walk yet, so that’s not an issue,” his father writes in the Daily Southtown, where he works as a columnist. “The plastic card has a picture of a toothless, grinning Bubba in the upper right corner. It includes his name, address and date of birth.”

In their defense, the police say they’re following the law. “There is nothing in the FOID Act or any of the rules that says anything about age restrictions,” Lt. Scott Compton tells the paper.


You’ve heard of Stuff White People Like and Stuff Black People Love, would it be appropriate to file this under Stuff White People Do?