But You Gotta A Girlfriend…

Yo check this out, you know those girls that have a girlfriend but still try to be all up in your face.  You know the ones that come through when they just had a fight or whatever and you know good and damn well that tomorrow everything will be alright between them and their girlfriend.  Yeah, those girls.  Will check it out.  This is what I told one of those girls….

You got a girlfriend. A girlfriend you live with. And no matter how cute I think you are and how much fun we have together, no matter how much you complain that you don’t like your girlfriend or that things are different, you got a girlfriend. One that you sleep with every night and wake up to every morning so it can’t be all that bad. You know what I am saying. What I’m not is one on the burner. What I’m not about to do is let you make a ho out of me just because you want your cake and eat it too. I’m also not going to be around the next time you call because today I realized, albeit late in the game, that hanging out with you is kind of like contributing to you being emotionally unfaithful to her and I’m not really trying to go out like that…even if I don’t care for your girl that much.  It’s more about me being a lady than caring about your girl’s feelings.  And to be perfectly honest, I am single because I choose to be not because I have to be.  I’m not second best unless I choose to be and I’m second to none.  I may be single, but I’m not desperate.   At least not as long as I have a electricity and a DVD player.  Holla. Karma can be a bitch and I don’t need that hanging over my head.  Woman to woman, I’m not Shirley and she ain’t Barbara.  Plus, I don’t really think it’s all that fair to me because like I said… you got a girlfriend. A girlfriend you live with. One that you sleep with every night and wake up to every morning so it can’t be all that bad.

And that’s for real.

The Court of Public Opinion

  • Mz Stud

    That’s right Jas, you deserve to have someone you can call your own and not be second. Being a stud, we tend to not be able to let go as easily as femmes do so we want our cake and eat it to. I’ve been there so I know what you’re talking about. But there’s a certain amount of respect that we should also have for ourselves because how you come out of one relationship is the same way you’ll go out of the next one. So while she’s going to bed with you and waking up with you, when you reach that, “its not working stage” then she’ll do the same to you…reach out to another woman for her cake. You’ll be that girlfriend. So stand your grounds gurl, you’re worth more than that.

  • Jan

    Hi Ms. Jas,

    I agree with you 100%. If you have a girlfriend, and are happy and maybe have a misunderstanding, work it out. Just think, if you had been with somebody for seven years and wake up one morning, and that person has passed………. Then what are you going to do????????

  • Amen.

  • man, same thing goes for womyn that know you have a gyrlfriend but still push up on you. i consider that as blatant disrespect to my relationship.

  • Rox

    O.K., now I get the entire picture. I am glad you broke it down. Second is not cool. I find myself in one of those single but not available relationships. Emotionally attached but well past the expiration date. That is not a healthy environment. I chose to be single for two years, I accepted NO shorts. You shouldn’t either J.
    Thanks for the real talk, and the friendly reminder.

  • kay

    Beautifully and clearly expressed with a hell yeah cherry on top!

  • J

    Girl!!! Well put. Let ’em know. Keep that drama where? Back there.