He Was Either Going to Carjack, Mug, Rape, Kill, or Do All of the Above to Me…

I joke a lot about how being single is oftentimes better than being in a relationship or being married, however there are sometimes when that is not the case.

I am a creature of habit. I don’t know why I am that way but I am. I find comfort in routine. I shop at the same stores, go to the same Starbucks, leave for work at the same time, return home around the same time, and the same goes for tennis, which I train for daily Monday through Friday. I never really thought much about my routine until tonight.

So I am pulling out of my driveway to leave for tennis practice and there’s a brotha standing at the end of my driveway on the street. When I pull all the way down to way to make my right hand turn, I notice that he’s just mad dogging a sista. I’m thinking, geez, just take a picture, it’ll last longer. But then it was time for me to go and that was that.

When I come back home 90 minutes later, I notice that a person is hiding behind the bush of my neighbors house. Well—to be honest, at the time, I didn’t think that they were hiding, I thought someone was bent down trying to get something. That was until I proceeded to pull up my driveway and noticed in my rear view mirror a man with a black hoodie on behind me.

I don’t think he expected me to make a u turn and back into my garage because when I did he tried to quickly hop the brick wall that separates my house from neighbors but I caught the tail end of him going over the wall out of the corner of me eye. And then the real creepy shit started.

Instead of hoping out of the car like I normally would, I sat there because something didn’t feel right. And sure enough, this guy kept peeping up over the brick wall looking at me–this time th hoodie pulled all the way up around his face and tied so I couldn’t make him out.

We always say what we’d do in a situation like that but I gotta tell you—it doesn’t always happen that way.

When I get nervous as in my life is in danger, I get these uncontrollable shakes. My legs shake, my arms, and my hands. I can’t dial numbers on my phone and I can barely drive.

When I realized that I was about the victim of some crime, I bolted. I wanted to alert my neighbors, but I couldn’t dial. I want to honk my horn, but I was afraid this guy had a gun. The only thing I could think to do was speed my ass down the driveway and away from him.

I ended up going around the corner to the homeboys house and calling the police. Who, to their credit, showed up promptly. Of course by then, the guy was gone.

My homeboy Malik keep reiterating to me that my routine is to predictable. Everybody who lives near me knows exactly when I am coming and going. And he’s right. The very nice LAPD officers, one of them a Black female said that I need to change it up but that I was doing better than most women because at least I was completely aware of my surrounding and what was going on.

I told them living over here you have to be on your p’s and q’s. As it turns out I was right.

Needless to say, tomorrow your girl is going to get a can of mace and a knife to keep in her car. I’d get a gun to keep at home, but I don’t like them.

In the meanwhile, the homeboy is coming over to spend the night because just in case anyone is watching there will be a big tall Black man up at my house tonight.

Sorry ladies, but tonight, I need a man, lol.

Special thanks to Malik and the LAPD for showing up with a helicopter and squad cars, I felt special and cared for and like my tax dollars were going to good use.

The Court of Public Opinion

  • This is really scary. Please be extra careful and make sure to keep the mace in your hand as you walk to the door. But you have to get past the shakes, otherwise, mace, knife nor gun will do you any good. You may want to think about some self-defense lessons. They will not only help you to protect yourself, but they will give you the self-confidence to do what you need to do in the event something like this happens again.

    It’s events like this that make us all think. Thanks for sharing.

  • Sorry this happened to you. I always carry a knife with me as does my sister and we tend to go out with each other at night for safety reasons. I think everyone gets nervous in those situations and I agree that once it’s happened, that’s the real test to what you would actually do. I do agree on changing up your schedule. It’s something that my sister and I have both learned to do to protect ourselves. A pet wouldn’t hurt either. I have a nice Rottweiler/Doberman mix that I like to sport around town and everyone seems to be afraid of her.

  • Chelle

    I’m so glad nothing happened to you.. I’m sittin here frantic tryin to get to the end of the blog to see if I need to race over. Please Jasmyne, you already know the neighborhood we’re in like you said so don’t delay in picking up that mace, box cutter, anything. Matter fact, I keep a baseball bat by my front door I might need to drop that off to you so let me cuz I will. But yeah, you need to keep something in your car.

    Let me know if you need anything, I’m not 6’2 but I can pack a bat, lol.

  • Jboogie

    Thanks ya’ll for the love. Yes–that shit really fucked me up a little in the head because you know after it happened you start to think well what if I hadn’t been paying attention, where would I be today? You know. I have more on this coming later this weekend because I was posed a very interesting question by a neighbor of mine and I think it’s worth discussing. Again, xoxoxo and thank you so much.

  • Richard “Ricky” Cryer

    Hey Jasmyne, you should’ve called me. You know that i’m down with you, if you need me don’t think twice, just do it.


  • girlfriend, I too am also glad you listened to that little voice that said, drive for help. And that you were not a white woman getting her purse snatched for the police to be on time. a gun not a good idea, most deaths are caused by the owner who is not trained on how to use it. Mace yes but still learn how to use it and not spray yourself like i did once and only once. The inner voice is the best weapon for any fears we have. Did you know you can learn how to defend yourself with anything you have access too? Your tennis racket can really bring some pain. Ask Serena Williams…Now Exhale

    Big love


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