Okay so it’s 3:30 in the morning and I am still in bed knocked the fuck out. My phone rings and by the time I decide to reach for it, I miss the call.  I look at the caller ID and I notice that it’s a blocked number so I figured it was someone at the radio station calling to see if I was coming in on this glorious Martin Luther King Jr. holiday—and I was.

I call the radio station and no one there had called me.  Strange I thought.

So then I had to do something that I don’t like to do and don’t do often but given the fact that my Grandma is sick right now and it could have been anyone calling, I checked my voicemail.

What I hear is someone, a female, a stud female (and yes I am racially profiling), who I think was inebriated, asking me to call them and telling them I can make some money quick if I’m down.

Now in my line of work, politics, quick money will get you a prison sentence—but nevertheless I said what the hell and I called the person back.

30 seconds into the conversation after the words club and stripper, I stopped the person and said um, you have the wrong Jasmyne, you want Stripper Jasmine, I am Political Jasmyne, sorry.

She didn’t believe me and let me tell you it took quite some convincing for me to get her to understand that while I am extremely interested in making a quick $500, I couldn’t get my fat ass to swing from a stripper pole to save my ass—not that I wouldn’t—just that I couldn’t.

Finally she believed me and we went on to talk about other things—more political while I was getting dressed to head out to the station.

And that my friends, is how I lost $500 this morning.